Tarhearted.

BOYFRIEND MATERIAL.

So.

I've secretly been writing a web series. Why is it a secret? I guess it feels less legitimate than theater, even though it'll probably be seen by many, many more people. Also, it's new for me and people I admire like Michael Cyril Creighton and Eliot Glazer are already doing it so well. (When It Gets Betterish premiered I'd already written three episodes of my show and almost gave up, it's so good.) That said, just because there are three good gay web series's out there, that isn't a reason for me not to do something, is it? I mean, there are at least ten good plays happening right now, right? (Tarhearted homeboy Robert Askins' Hand to God is coming back in February for eight more weeks, btw!)

The truth is that sometimes you have to do something different to stay sane. I have lots of amazing theater projects coming down the line (did you see that MilkMilkLemonade is #1? Sorry, Mike Daisey.) Plus TV projects and a graphic novel. The thing is, I need a project I can be the boss of. I'm a very collaborative writer, and not at all sensitive about taking notes, but when you're not self-producing theater, when you have a book deal, when you're working with producers on TV pilots... all you do is take notes, and it can start to wear on you (me.)

So.

If I don't chicken out, Boyfriend Material will be a six episode black comedy that follows a broke faggot named Curry Carmichael around Brooklyn over the course of one day as he is dumped for not being "straight acting" enough, tries to score a trendy new drug called Super Coke, gives a Hasid a hand job, prevents a lesbian suicide, and attends the premiere of a performance art piece with a transgender mugger.

I think it's different enough from the three gay web series I like to warrant being made. Boyfriend Material will be in black & white and filmed in Broolyn's finest crack dens, alleys and abandoned buildings.  It's a nod to a New York City that was grittier and presumably more fun, and a simultaneous satire/celebration of underground filmmakers like Kenneth Anger, Andy Warhol and the earliest John Waters.

At least, that's my hope for it. Maybe I'll still chicken out. If not, look for an incessant and aggressive fund raising campaign in the next month. On second thought, you won't need to. I'll find you.

In the mean time, please enjoy these great web series.

 

Jack in a Box

Two Jasperjohns

It Gets Betterish

AN ADDENDUM.

I'm also grateful for the amazing Married to the Sea.

I SMELL SHITTY PANTIES.

Oh, happy day! They've finally made a sequel to Jiz and the Mammograms, a youtube favorite amongst my friends. Its predecessor is comedy genius, so make sure to watch it first.

This is super NSFW or for life.

EXCUSE MY BEAUTY.

Half of my Witchboard photos are up at my best friend Jeff and I's brand new blog!

Who Needs to Read?

Nobody, that's who.

PLAY NICE.

You know what's a bummer about this? I'll bet the blogger is an assistant somewhere or somebody within the service industry that Cohen was nasty to.

I briefly worked at a spa on the Upper East Side when I was in my early twenties. I speak from experience when I tell that the wealthy women of Manhattan are awful. Yes, all of them. I wanted to make tee shirts about our clients so badly and wear them around Manhattan.

Patricia Grosz is gross.

Deborah Lipschiz is the dark half.

Connie Cohen is a cunt.

And so on. I should mention that these are fake names, by the way, so don't sue me or anything. I don't know the model in question, so it may be that she's a perfectly lovely woman both inside and out. My instinct though tells me that bloggers don't lash out at people at random.

Words to the wise: if you don't want anonymous bloggers calling you "psychotic" or a "ho" then don't be a psychotic ho.

 

(I use this image of Lila Fowler of Sweet Valley High whenever I need an image of a rich bitch. It just works.)

I WANT TO GO TO ICE PROM.

Married to the Sea is my favorite thing ever.

HOT DOG!

I know it's being posted a lot on various blogs, but it needs repeating on the off chance you haven't seen this miracle of VHS tape. I know I say this at least once a week, but this truly is the most aesthetically pleasing four minutes you could spend.

Hot dog!